Many small business owners experience feelings of shame when their ventures do not succeed, often intertwining their identities with their business outcomes. This emotion can be particularly intensified when financial losses involve personal connections. How should one deal with these feelings of shame?
This week, ECNETNews discusses insights from Dr. Abbie Maroño, author of the enlightening book “Work in Progress: The Road to Empowerment, The Journey Through Shame.” Dr. Maroño sheds light on the significant yet frequently underestimated role of shame in personal development. She highlights how this powerful emotion is closely linked to our self-identity. For entrepreneurs, the distinction between personal and business success can become blurred, making failures feel profoundly personal. Dr. Maroño identifies two critical types of shame:
- Healthy Shame: Serves as a motivator for personal development and improvement.
- Toxic Shame: Results in a sense of inadequacy and lowers self-worth.
Understanding and Managing Shame
To effectively deal with feelings of shame, Dr. Maroño recommends the following strategies:
- Acknowledge the Shame: Accept that experiencing shame is a normal reaction to setbacks.
- Reflect on the Source: Examine the reasons behind your shame, considering if they arise from unrealistic expectations or societal pressure.
- Avoid Distractions: Resist the temptation to escape these feelings through overworking or unhealthy coping mechanisms.
- Reframe Negative Thoughts: Change your perspective to view failures as valuable learning experiences rather than personal deficiencies.
The Role of Social Media
Social media can intensify feelings of shame by projecting an unrealistic standard of success. Entrepreneurs may find themselves comparing their journeys to those of others, often leading to feelings of inadequacy. Dr. Maroño advises:
- Limit Social Media Engagement: Be conscious of your time spent on these platforms.
- Focus on Your Own Path: Understand that social media showcases achievements rather than the struggles faced along the way.
Distancing Identity from Business Success
It is crucial for entrepreneurs to develop a sense of self that exists apart from their business outcomes. Dr. Maroño suggests:
- Explore Personal Values and Interests: Participate in non-work-related activities that bring joy and satisfaction.
- Establish a Support Network: Connect with mentors, friends, and professionals who can offer encouragement and valuable insight.
Concrete Steps to Move Forward
For those grappling with overwhelming shame, Dr. Maroño recommends:
- Set a Time Limit for Processing Emotions: Allow yourself to feel these emotions but limit the grieving period to, for instance, 48 hours.
- Take Positive Action: Concentrate on actionable steps to progress, such as drafting a new business plan or seeking professional guidance.
Stay informed with more insights by tuning in to ECNETNews.
